ravers | Hipster Runoff


INDIE HUNK ALERT: Mark Foster, lead singer of Foster the People, spotted shirtless at rave, glowsticking

Mark Foster has it all
1 of the most popular, highest-selling songs of 2k11
in 'Pumped Up Kicks'
Tons of BJs from mad bitches

But most importantly
he has a love for rave-wave music
and SICK glowsticking skills
Mark Foster can twirl with the best of them.

Much like his own music career
Foster creates a vortex of positivity
within the orb of his glow
Rave, Rave, Against the Dying of the Buzz

Ur coonskin raver hat
unites u with the forest creatures
of the Dark Rave Forest
Glowsticks are an extension of ur nocturnal nature

Sometimes it feels
like when we rave
we are sorta wearing pumped up kicks
if u rlly think abt it...

I wish I could run right into ur bulky arms
falling asleep on ur tribal tat
I'm glad u finally took off ur church boy indie uniform

And showed us the BANGIN BOD that God blessed u with
Do u vibe on protein?
Muscle Milk?
How do u bulk up?
Tell me ur secrets, FosterTheBB...

Mark Foster has it all
a sick songwriting sensibilitie
a sick bod
a sick tribal tat
a sick coonskin raver hat

There is an art to glowstick twirling.
More importantly
there is an art to the photography of glowstick twirling

U look good, Mark BB!

Does Mark Foster look 'baller' and 'swag' as a raver?
Is 'Pumped Up Kicks' the #1 song of all time?
R u gonna get a tribal tat?
Are glowsticks the most authentic rave accessory?
Should I start a glowstick dance academy?

Skrillex, Diplo, Steve Aoki, & A-Trak play a Rave Cruise called HOLY SHIP. Was it the Electro Titanic?

Photos by Rony's PhotoBooth
holy ship haircut
What if I told u that there was a magical ship that was filled with the most relevant DJs in the world: Skrillex, Steve Aoki, Diplo, A-TRAK, and MORE setting sail, heading towards destination: PARTY ISLAND, but then while u were on the journey to PARTY ISLAND, u realized that PARTY ISLAND was in fact a destination that lived inside ur heart? Would u jump on board this ship with the opportunity to bronoodle with premium nip slipping bikini BBs, dubstream tatted up bros, relevant DJs, hot altbagettes, and the most relevant ppl in the world? What if I told u that the entire ship was a metaphorical VIP area?

This was Holy Ship, some sort of 'electro rave cruise' that happened last weekend. It was an 'epic hang', although it could have ben widely referred to as 'the day the dubstep died' and/or 'Electro Titanic' if there was some sort of iceberg-wave tragedy.

Did u go 2 Holy Ship?

'Pick me up on Monday, mom.'

'Behind me, we will make DJ/dubstep history. Molly dealers will arrive to the ship in tugboats.'

Me and my best dubstream altbros were prepared to die on Holy Ship.

True or False: This is a picture of the most relevant DJs in the entire world.

Such SICK glowstick moves could only be legal in international waters...

How many Skrillexes can u carry?

Me and a Wizard! #selfpic

One thing I love abt Diplo is that he is always willing to expose the Western World to the 'savage, sexual dance moves' of foreigners and ethnics.

The Dubstep Guy from Korn and the guy from the Pamela Anderson sex tape were both there trying to improve their DJ careers

'One time I made a sweet sex tape with my wife, Pamela Anderson Lee on a boat. This boat is not as fun.' -Tommy Lee, future dubstepper of America association.


It was 'cheat day' at the Carnival Cruise buffet.

Steve Aoki and his usual 'Yes, I am paid to be here. You are not.' face.

Ray Liotta was there.

NIP SLIPS & HOT B00BZ AHEAD! AHOY! ----------->


Alternative Celebrity, DJ

Skrillex is a popular dubstep DJ who is arguably the #1 alt DJ in the world.

Read more>>>>


Alternative Celebrity, DJ

A-Trak is a popular alt DJ who is also mainstream.

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DJ, Alternative Celebrity

Diplo is a relevant alt DJ and producer.

Read more>>>>

Molly is one helluva drug. A Love Letter 2 Molly.

Photo via the cobrasnake

Molly has completely taken over my life.
She makes me feel like no other.
I feel like I'm addicted to Molly
She's taken over my system.

I'll never be able to see the world the same again after Molly
She makes me feel alive
She makes colors brighter
She turns sounds into shapes
Molly finds a way to make everything feel better.

Molly and I do everything together
We'll go to raves
We'll go to the movies
We'll sit around the apartment, listening to dubstep
Watching a cool light machine that we bought at the drug paraphernalia store at the mall
We'll stay up all night, then go out to breakfast

Molly is everything to me.
No one has opened me up quite like Molly has
She makes me unafraid to dance
Unafraid to smile
Unafraid to live

I grab her by the ass on the dance floor
and look into her eyes
and I kiss her
yeah... her sex is on fire. :-)

Molly makes me feel like I am rolling in the deep... in a good way

There will never be another one like Molly
Sometimes I worry that she'll run out on me one day
Sometimes I worry that she belongs to every one else
But then when I get Molly all to myself
All of my worries disappear.

There is no1 like Molly
Sometimes I get so overwhelmed that I just sit in darkness to try to get her out of my head
But then I realize that Molly is everything.

We'll laugh
We'll cry
We'll vibe
We'll cum
We'll curl up into a little ball and pretend we are amoeba

Molly can be so much sometimes.
I have to remember to drink water when I'm around her
She has a way of dehydrating me
Taking over my sensory system

I don't know how u do it to me
But u do it for me
And I want to be on Molly all the time now
A life without Molly is not a life worth living.

Molly. I'm in love with u.

I <3 Molly.
Do u <3 Molly?


"CMON RAVER BRO... That just doesn't even make sense... I am going to put on ur own bracelets and pummel you to death with them"

Photos by the cobrasnake

The Identity Festival came to a close this month, so there were tons more rave photos in miscellaneous locations around the country. We are continuing to monitor the proliferation of electro culture. Yes, 'electro music' has been around for a long time, but we are witnessing history as it continues 2 'go mainstream'. The modern rave is a threat to the traditional music festival because Generation Z kids might not care about Generation Y's boring ass indie music.


R u going 2 go 2 Identity Festival next year to laugh @ all the ravers?
Or will u be there 2 RAGE LEGIT DUBSTEP?
Do u <3 or h8 RAVES?
Is MOLLY the official drug of the 2k11 rave?

Goo Goo Gaa Gaa Rave Rave! [via massive amounts of molly on my pacifier]

THIS IS HOW I ROLL [via acid / molly / xtc / mdma]

Electro music caused me 2 have a face period. #face_periods

'Ever since grandma died, grandpa has been trying to find himself. My grandpa became a raver.'

U still call it HOUSE MUSIC, bro? I thought the generally accepted term 4 the vague genre of popular electro is currently 'dubstep'?

'I only leave my grammy's basement when there is a rave within a 400 mile radius of her home.'

Raving is an equal opportunity experience

Why is ur ear blue? Why is a home improvement project dangling from ur ear?

Aoki, some dog in an Aoki shirt, and the dude from Breaking Bad

Is rave rafting more dangerous than 'white water rafting'?

Big Ole Rave Ass up in my face

sh0w m0ar b00b

'I'll take a double raveburger with dubfries and a small molly milkshake.'

If I tackle this bro, do I get a 1-UP / extra life?


The Cobrasnake

Alternative Celebrity

Mark Hunter is the Cobrasnake, some bro who travels around the world taking pictures of alt shit so now he has a lifestyle brand.

Read more>>>>


Alternative Celebrity, DJ

Skrillex is a popular dubstep DJ who is arguably the #1 alt DJ in the world.

Read more>>>>

Bebe Zeva

Alternative Celebrity

Bebe Zeva is a model for the I AM CARLES brand.

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Bro in a dubstep shirt eats at Chili's. Has dubstep gone mainstream [via dubstream]?

An overgrown tween bro sits in a Chili's stuffing his face with sliders, boneless buffalo wings, chicken crispers, SXSWestern eggrolls, and spinach artichoke dip. He wears a shirt that says 'DUBSTEP' on it multiple times.

Is he a mainstreamer?
Is he a lamestreamer?
Is he an alt?
Is he a raver?
Is he a tween alt?
Is he a dubstepper?

No. He is a dubstreamer. An emerging genre of suburban bros who are vibing to the recent 'trendy' electronic music called 'dubstep' that is going mainstream. Sure, he might listen to other bubble gum indie, but he understands that 'being into electro/dubstep' means that his vibe is on the cutting edge of modern partying. He goes to festivals to take some mollies, then feel the deep bass in his tummy, shaking his Chili's food within him as he digests.

Look at this effing dubstreamer. [Photos via the cobrasnake]

Raver or dubstreamer?

Looking keut in some dubstreamer gear

"The highlight of my life was watching Skrillex and an unmasked Deadmau5 dropping some heavy dubbeats at an exclusive impromptu VIP performance."

In the future, dubstep will be played at Chili's.
Dubstep is already on top 40 radio.
Brit Spears is already dubsteppy.
Dubstep DJs are becoming the most popular humans in the world.

Dubstreamers are a new relevant genre of alternative humans.

Yes, some ppl are still 'ravers', but the majority of these ppl are probably 'dubstreamers.'

Let's meet up at Chili's with our dubstream bros.

R u a dubstreamer?
Do u h8 dubstreamers?
Is dubstream 'the new punk'?
Is there a difference between 'dubstep' and 'dubstream'?
Did dubstreamers ruin dubstep?
Are the forces behind the dubstream explosion taking advantage of alternative middle markets in ways that high end indie never could?
What's the difference between a raver and a dubstreamer?

Welcome 2 the dubstream era!

RAVE OR DIE 4EVR & EVR: The Middle American Commercialization of Rave

Photos by thecobrasnake

Apparently, 'raves' are totally hot right now, and there is some alt music festival going across the country called Identity Festival. Basically, they are taking the high-end marketed commercial rave vibes to Middle Americans who like to vibe out to LEGIT DUBSTEP like effing ROCKSTARS with SWAG who like to RAGE. SO CA$H. It seems like the spirit of high-end California wave marketed electro is sweeping across the nation thanks to acts like Deadmau5, Skrillex, and Steve Aoki. S0, S0 very CA$H.

It's great to see juggalos evolving beyond horrorcore to get into electro, dubstep, house-wave, and bangercore. 'It really feels like electro is the modern punk' -some bro who is really proud of being into electro

Have Middle Americans 'ruined' electro rave vibes?
Has 'electro music' become more popular than boring ass white man's 'indie'?


One of the creators of South Park, Steve Aoki, and Diplo share an intimate moment backstage 2gether.

i am JACKED on Rock Star Energy Drink!


Waiting til nite to pull out the glow sticks

This is groovier than Pizza Hut stuffed crust pizza after a series of bong rips in my suburban apartment!

$11??? for Coors Light? What a rip off!

So blazed... SO CA$H...

Rave Devil Horn bro

My dubsteppy cool dad is S0 CA$H

Lookin good, bb!

I don't give an EFF... but I am kinda pumped that Steve Aoki autographed my head.

Save the hulahoop for Marleyfest, bb [via ppl who float between alt events just to do drugs]

I am safe from radioactive non-electro vibes

A keut lil rapegaze bb!


Go back to the Gathering, friggin Juggalos!

Go back to Myspace, friggin myspacer!

Not sure where yall came from, so can't tell u where 2 go back 2....

'Meet me in the bathroom, bb' -The Strokes


Life Beyond the Rave: What is a raver's life like when they aren't raving?

Photo by thecobrasnake

Hi. We're in a serious relationship where we are not just dedicated to one another, but also the act of 'raving.' We are always on the lookout for a great new DJ, electro house mp3, or regional rave that we can drive 2. In addition, we spend a lot of time networking with a lot of other underground ravers, eventually looking to plan our own event. Unfortunately, it has become more difficult to plan a rave in a public park in the greater Los Angeles area.

The truth is, we're just like any mainstream couple. We eat most meals at Taco Bell. We enjoy going 'thrifting' at used toy stores, looking to find the child_wave accessory to put our personal brands over the top at the next rave. If you know a great place to find low-priced toys, backpacks, and other places where we can hide drugs, let us know.

Recently we adopted this African American baby. I know what ur thinking, "That's not a real baby." But the truth is, our rave-and-go lifestyle doesn't really allow us to take care of any one other than ourselves. Not even small pets. When you're off the grid for 5 days after ODing + suffering from rowdy dehydration--let's just say u shouldn't own a real baby unless ur interested in committing murder.

I'd say most ravers are misunderstood. They think we don't value life, and we just want to escape every chance we get at festivals that celebrate deviant electronic sounds and man-made drugs. While we do enjoy those things, we also take time to appreciate the simple things.

We like to shop for beanies and Indian_wave fleeces.
We do like to go to the desert and do peyote.
We enjoy getting piercings in kewl places.
We love Kool-Aid--not just for drinking, but also for colouring our hair.
We're always down to sit in the back of any van, have a great conversation, and take as many unknown pills as possible.

I know u wouldn't believe it, but we're just like you when we're not at raves.

The RaveWave lifestyle isn't just about 'Rave or Die.'
We believe that we have the option to 'Rave and Live.'

Are ravers 'valuable members of society' or do they just 'do tons of drugs', burden our emergency response healthcare services, and steal toys from children in need?
Do u ever see ravers doing 'normal ppl thing' and say 2 urself "Why don't yall just go to a rave and stop ruining the real world?"
Should all ravers be shipped 2 Australia so they can just live 'the party lifestyle' 24/7 in metaphorical exile?
Is it weird 2 see ppl who are 'way alt' in a normal context?

The Cobrasnake

Alternative Celebrity

Mark Hunter is the Cobrasnake, some bro who travels around the world taking pictures of alt shit so now he has a lifestyle brand.

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I’m hornie.

Photo by the Stereo Argonaut

I'm so hornie
Super hornie
Just a hornie raver bro
Gonna get some horns
and glue that shit 2 my head.

Would be 'mad alt' if I were some how able
to grow horns out of my skull
Sorta look like the devil

Kinda jeal of ram horns though...

They seem mad alt
like u can really 'butt heads' with people
both physically
and intellectually

Elephant tusks seem mad alt, too

Bet u can really 'gore up ur parents'
when they tell u that u can't go out
and that u are not really 'gay'
that ur just pretending to be gay 'just to be different'

Horny toads seem chill too

Horns seem aggressive
but at the same time
'just trying to protect myself'
from so many natural and social predators who are trying to dampen my vibe/brand

Piercings on my face
connecting my nose 2 my mouth
Raver bracelets on my arms
painted finger nails

They are all pretty sweet personal branding tools
But I just wish I had something that 'set me apart' from the crowd
without being a deformity
Something that made me look like I was 'half animal, half human'
Kinda like the wolf tweens [link]

I'm deviant
I'm dark
I'm hornie

Just a lil hornie bro
Might go 2 a rave

I'm hornie
Gonna make out with my bro

Erect peens
I don't believe in 'gender'
I just believe in <3, h8, and cum
bc I'm hornie.

R u hornie?
Are horns an authentic personal branding tool?
Do ravers come up with the best personal branding gimmicks?
Do u know where I can buy some horns, or do I have 2 kill an animal?
What is the most authentic animal with horns?

Diplo mourns loss of twerking world record due to deaths at Electric Zoo NY

At last weekend's Electric Zoo music festival, one DJ had the stage set to perform something spectacular, and I'm not just talking about another sick DJ set with accompanying visuals and outspoken ethnic hypemen. Wesley Pentz, better known as 43 year old EDM DJ Diplo is an indie dance pioneer had planned to break the world record for twerking, inviting hundreds if not thousands of large-assed women to the stage in order to twerk. It was an ambitious plan, requiring a series of architects, structural engineers, publicists, managers, and a large team of workers to transition this from an idea to reality.

Understanding Diplo means understanding why this record means so much to him. It's one thing to be a DJ, pressing play while pretending to twist knobs. But Diplo is different. With over 1 million followers on Twitter, the guy just plain knows what he's doing. He knows what appeals to fans, getting his name out there to any one who is looking for a good time. The brand is all about fun. What makes him unique isn't his ability to start cultural movements with his internationally curated original sound, but the guy has vision.

Twerking is a popular dance trend. Some cultural critics call it "the new Macarena." Others say that it might just be the next Harlem Shake. One thing's for sure, the kids are crazy about this craze, and it's not going anywhere. In the sphere of popular culture, the Miley Cyrus girl did get in trouble for twerking; however, it did bring her lots of attention, which happens to be the purpose of marketing.

Diplo dared to ask: What if we rethought twerking?

Instead of just one single person twerking, a group of people could twerk together. By setting the world twerking record, we could tear down racial barriers. Humans could be judged not by the size of their ass OR by their ability to shake it. Instead, the spirit of twerking could be bypassed from our generation downward. It's not just a fad--it is a way of life.

Our lives.

Understanding the twerk means understanding just why Diplo might be the voice of a generation. But in a cruel twist of fate, perhaps God robbed him from his destiny.

The twerking world record was everything. And then, in the blink of an eye, it was nothing.

ATTENTION LADIES! Diplo has yet again raised the bar for his live performances with his announcement of a world record TWERK wall at Electric Zoo 2013 and his search for 50 top twerkers to #ExpressYourself on stage and break a world record during his performance at Electric Zoo on Randall’s Island Park on Sunday, September 1.

Diplo has announced a contest for fans to submit their best twerking videos to Twerk4Diplo@gmail.com for free admission and a chance to show the world what they’ve got.

All contestants much be 18+ and must be able to provide their own transportation to Randall’s Island, New York. Winners will be notified via e-mail.

Check out the official announcements via @Diplo’s Twitter and Instagram video:

Sunday morning started out like most Sunday mornings for me. A McGriddle, a McCafe, and a McHashbrown. It's important to fuel up before a festival, or else you'll see your glucose levels drop faster than a diabetic in a Souper Salad.

I started getting texts from friends, many who are relevant members of the EDM community. "Is it gonna be cancelled?" "You still goin?" Other, less relevant friends were wondering, "Do you think we'll get our money back?"

The truth was. I did not know. I did not know what my day had in store, but by the time I thought about it, there were already thoughts in my head.

On Sunday morning, it was official. Festival organizers were forced to pull the plug on the festival.

But why?

Two deaths related to the popular recreational drug "molly" aka "XTC" aka "ecstasy" AKA "MDMA." A drug that had become more popular than twerking itself.

Jeffrey Russ, 23, a graduate of Syracuse University, and Olivia Rotondo, a 20-year-old student at the University of New Hampshire, died after taking doses of a popular party drug. Who knows it this is true, and who knows if they were going to be participating in the highly.

Perhaps there are social consequences of twerking.

Olivia Rotondo, 20, of Providence, R.I., was taken from the festival to Metropolitan Hospital at 8:45 p.m. Saturday and died about 50 minutes later.

Before they died, both Russ and Rotondo had time to tweet about their upcoming festival experiences.
“The amount of traveling I’ve done today is unreal. Just get me to the damn zoo,” tweeted Rotondo, who was eager to arrive at the festival grounds in order to experience the trend of dance music, and perhaps even twerking and maybe even see Diplo.

Russ, who graduated from Syracuse University last year with a degree in information technology, was also excited to attend the music festival. He went to the concert with his Sigma Chi frat brothers. In his final hours, he tweeted a photo from the festival and expressed admiration for LeVeLs producer Avicii, the popular EDM DJ. “Avicii saved my life,” he tweeted. In a way, Avicii perhaps ended his life.

“I actually spoke to him Friday — and he was so happy. He was having so much fun,” said Russ’ sister Melissa Russ, 25.

“The Electric Zoo organizers have worked with city officials to reduce health risks at this event, but in view of these occurrences, the safest course is to cancel the remaining day of the event,” the NYPD and Bloomberg released in a joint statement.

So many dark things happened at Electric Zoo. It makes us wonder, how many terrible things are happening at festivals around the world? Rapes, public humiliation, bullying, murder, and more. Electronic dance music festivals may have degenerated into a lawless land, with no order and no health services. Perhaps parents are right in perceiving these places as nothing but death traps for their rebelling high school or college student. Experimentation leads to tragedy.

A 16-year-old girl reported waking up under a van in the event’s parking lot Friday with her pants down and her legs scratched and bruised, cops said. She was treated at New York-Presbyterian Hospital Weill Cornell. The NYPD’s special victims unit is investigating.

On Sunday at the Electric Zoo, all of the animals were executed. An odd silence swept the festival grounds. The sound was... Well, the sound was quiet.

On Sunday morning, crews were still on the festival grounds. There were no fans, and most entertainers had booked a flight out of town, ready to collect their booking fee for the next concert or show.

But not Diplo. The man couldn't stop thinking about asses shaking to his music.

He walked around the festival grounds, pointing at where the "twerk wall" would have gone. "That's where we would've broken the record" as he pointed to the Cricket Wireless mainstage. The stage still had branding on its sides, but who knows if the brand got their refund.

The broken dream of the twerk wall hurt the scene. So many people were looking forward to the record being broken. Sure, he would go on to see many girls twerk in the remaining years of his life. But would he ever get the record again? Chances like that come once in a lifetime.

He wasn't angry though. Wesley didn't blame the dead people, or their families. It just wasn't time right now. God had spoken.

The DJ has long accepted death as part of the EDM scene. It's just like James Dean, sometimes you gotta walk that line in order to have the most fun. It's no one's fault, but some people just live it to the max. Blame the dealer. Blame the organizer. Blame the festival. Blame the publicly funded park. Blame the local health professionals and hospitals. Blame the DJs. Blame the scene.

But it's not stopping. I'm sure one day, Diplo will break that record, no matter how many dead 16-25 year olds it takes.

Would you know my ass
if you saw me ghost twerking in heaven?

-Eric Clapton, "Twerx in Heaven"

Editor's Note: Sections of this article were fabricated for dramatic effect, similar to a Lifetime Movie.


DJ, Alternative Celebrity

Diplo is a relevant alt DJ and producer.

Read more>>>>

Is this bro the ultimate Bro-bag?

Photo via @Atrak

I remember when bros 'went mainstream'
Every1 was all like 'Bro Bro Bro McBroBro'
but then 'bros' sorta went out of style

Now every bro is being all #menswear
And all the young bros are trying 2 be #swag

Every1's trying to look like a catalog model
Give it up, bros

We all know that u will never be as bro as this bro
The ultimate effing bro
That is srsly 1 helluvabro

2 much bro for 1 tank top

U have to wonder if he is 'too bro'
to be wearing 'rave gear'
But maybe he is like 16 years old
just broin' out

I miss the Glory Days of Bros
When culture underwent a true broliferation
Now, after so much #Bro_shaming
Bros can't just be bros the way that they used to

But maybe we can learn something from this bro
That bros live on
Bros will live forever
Especially when a bro can bro this hard.

We miss the era of the Bro
Where have all the bros gone?
Perhaps they have turned into men
and now we can't tell the tween from the bro
or the bro from the post-tween
or the post-tween from the tween
or the tween from the bro
or the bro from the bro

Are Bros Dead?
Will bros live on forever in the bodies of built lamestreamers?
Do u wanna get #swole?
Where have all the bros gone?


Middle Aged Man goes to a Skrillex show, morphs into RAGING dubstep VIP dbag

Photos by The Cobrasnake

Middle Aged Man.
Searching for something more.
Middle Aged Man.
Career going very well.

Meet Mitchell. Go ahead and call him "Mitch." He is in middle management at a regional Samsung supplier, a liaison to partners in the Far East and a well-respected project manager within the company. Mitch posted huge numbers in 2012-Q1. The biggest thrill of his life was watching the birth of his only son, Mitchell Jr. Well, besides the time he had to go to Thailand and purchased sex from a she-male prostitute. Mitch has a dark side, tired of his life. Tired of his job. Tired of day to day responsibilities. Tired of the way he looked. The way he felt. The way young people looked at him as if he didn't exist, just a boring background face in their lives'.

This night had been a long time coming for Mitch.

The night it all changed was a Samsung Galaxy S III launch party. He had never heard of Skrillex. He had never heard dubstep. He had never even been to a sponsored event with an open bar. Over the course of the night, Mitch found a new scene where he truly belonged.


He felt the dub, the womp womp, the bass, the youth, the feelings, the vibes, the emotions in his entire body.

Mitch was finally free. The person he never had the opportunity to be. Tonight, Mitch was a bottle poppin VIP ass nigga, tearing up the club. The club truly could not handle Mitch right now.


Mitch had so much confidence in his new environment. He felt like any girl could be his. He approached with his failsafe Mitch 2.0 line, "Do you know who I am, bb?"

Young people looked at Mitch and at first it looked like he didn't belong. But the way Mitch partied was admirable. By the end of the night, every one was friends with Mitch. Mitch insisted on ordering rounds of shots for the entire party even though the alcohol was free.

We can learn a lot about the human spirit from Mitch. Maybe we're all just searching for a fun place, young, pretty people, and most importantly, an open bar. Maybe we're all just scavenging this Earth for a free drink, a good friend. A pal like Mitch. Even though something like a product launch is what brought us all together, maybe we need to focus on the pure vibes of a free spirit like Mitch.

Maybe we learned that the spirit of Skrillex can invade any one, despite their age, size, race, nationality, or sexual orientation. Perhaps the power of the Samsung Galaxy Android Phone is inside of us all.

O Mitch...
No1 does it like u, Mitch...
U truly have infinite swag

Last night, the entire world belonged to Mitch.


Did this Middle Aged Man turn into a VIP raver d-bag?
Or is he the purest, alt-est soul of 2k12?
Is 'craft beer' the only thing that a middle aged man can taste?
What did u learn from the Story of Mitch?


Alternative Celebrity, Meme

Mitchell, aka Mitch, is a partying middle aged bro.

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Alternative Celebrity, DJ

Skrillex is a popular dubstep DJ who is arguably the #1 alt DJ in the world.

Read more>>>>

I ran into my uncle at a rave. He is considered the black sheep of our family.

I was planning for a solid night out at a regional rave, where some of the region's top DJs were playing, but I ended up getting a little bit more than I bargained for.

I ran into my uncle.

He's on my dad's side of the family. When I was young, I remember my parents being really weird about him. They wouldn't let me be in the same room as him, and we never went to his apartment, which was on the bad side of town. It turns out that the area he lived in is a popular gay community. My parent's had me convinced that he was a 'peder-ass.'

Anyways, during a sick dubstep remix, I spotted my uncle on the dance floor. He was shirtless, and sorta being 'that guy who grinds on younger broads' in a sad way. I tried to avoid him the entire night, until I ran into him at a bar.

He did a 'doubletake', since he hadn't seen me in over a decade, but I look a lot like my dad, so I probably have this 'look of hate' in my DNA that he could identify. We exchanged pleasantries, and I had to hug his sweaty body. He purchased me a premium, cold bottled imported beer. It was one of the beers I had ever tasted in my young life.

He said he was there to try to pick up some pussy, and maybe had a girl meeting him there at 3 am. I guess he wasn't a homosexual after all. He was just like me. He was a raver bro who liked to chill out, molly out, get his dance on, and grind on bitches.

As I drove home, totally mollied out, drunk, and high off some schwag that some 1 handed to me, I couldn't help but think, "Why did my parents hate my uncle? Were they afraid that I would become a raver?"

My uncle wasn't a bad guy. I wish I had the opportunity to spend more time with him when I was young, because it seemed like he could relate to young people. Fortunately, we made plans to meet at an upcoming event to which we both had tickets.

My uncle was a great role model. I wouldn't mind ending up like him.

DARK CONFESSION: I went to a rave and took advantage of a girl who was ROLLING HARD

Photo by Last Nights Party

I'm not proud of what I did, but in the moment, I thought it was the right thing to do. For my peen.

I had been standing at the front of the stage with my bro for the past 2 hours. It sorta sucks hanging out with a bro, but I noticed this girl who was all alone. Before the show, we sorta talked and she seemed nice. I thought she was more into my bro, but I wasn't going to let him have a freebie. It was effing on.

She was a nice girl, and we had both come to see the DJ set of the opener, not the headliner. Then she got totally effed up. I believe she took a drug called 'molly.'

During the show, I inched closer to her. I positioned my peen area against her backside, but it wasn't fully erect or anything. It felt good to be close to her. I hadn't been with a girl since my ex broke up with me when I was 13 years old.

Then she continued to raise up against the baracade, and I figured that she needed support because she was clearly on a ton of drugs. Her skin was soft. I cupped her breasts, squeezing her nipples thru her padded bra. She didn't say 'no'... I'm just saying...

Then I started to kiss her neck. It seemed like she was experiencing pleasure, and I ran my hands all over her body. Even towards her vagine, where she had a nice landing strip of pubic hair.

I'm not saying it was right or wrong, but in the moment, at that rave, everything felt like it was the way it was supposed to be. She kissed me once. I felt happy. I could tell that my bro was jealous because I had scored some hot raver poontang, but he had his shot. She liked me. Even if it was just for a 3 hour DJ set, it was one of the most sensual experiences of my life.

After the show, she passed out inside a portapotty, and my mom came to pick up me and my bro. I checked the newspapers the next day, and no one died. I hope she is alright.

I think I love her. I don't think I took advantage of her.

The Little Raver Who Could [RAVE HAS NO SIZE]

Photo by the Cobrasnake

A little raver had a super important rave 2 attend.

He went along very well till he came to a MASSIVE CROWD. But then, no matter how hard he tried, he could not move the dense pack of ravers and dubstreamers.

He PUSHED and he PUSHED. He ROLLED and he MOLLIED. He backed and started off again. DUB! WUB!

But no! the little raver could not make it to the front of the crowd. He was stuck in non-VIP, General Admission hell.

The little raver understood that it was time 2 get some help...

"Surely I can find someone to help me crowdsurf 2 the front where I can see my fave EDM DJ playing some tunes," he thought.

Over the hill and up the track went the little raver. Choo, choo! Choo, choo! Choo, choo! Choo! DUB! BASS EFFING DROP! LEGIT SWAG DUBSTEP.

Pretty soon he saw a big raver bro standing in the middle of the crowd. He looked very big and strong. Running alongside, the little raver looked up and said:

"Will you help me over the crowd with my tiny raver body? I love this music just as much as any1 else."

The big raver looked down at the little raver. The he said:

"Don't you see that I am rolling my balls off and trying to make out with this bitch dressed up as a fucking Sesame Street character? I'm seriously frying here, trying to make MY way to the front. No, I cannot help you,"

The little raver was sorry, but he went on, Choo, choo! Choo, choo! Choo, choo! Choo, choo! DUB! WOMP! WOOOMP!

Soon he came to a second raver hottie broad wearing basically nothing. He was puffing and puffing, as if he were tired.

"That raver whore may help me," thought the little raver. He ran up to her and asked:

"Will you help me get to the front of this relevant show? There are so many ppl who are so tall, that I can't get over there."

The raver whore answered:

"I have been here since 3 pm, dancing my ass off, and I am really dehyrdrated, basically about to die. Don't you see how tired I am? Can't you get some other raver to help you this time?

"I'll try to do this shit myself," said the little raver, and off he went. Choo, choo! Choo, choo! Choo, choo! DUB WUB DUB WOMP BOOM BASS DROP.

Eventually, the little raver took matters into his own hands. He climbed up some raver's backpack, and had some guy who was on tons of drugs push him above the crowd.

Puff, puff! Chug, choo! Off he started! He began to float above the crowd to the front

Slowly the lil raver began to move. Slowly he climbed to the front of the crowd. As he climbed, the littler raver began to sing:

"I-think-I-can! I-think-I-can! I-think-I-can! I-think-I-can! I-think-I-can! I-think-I-can! I think I can - I think I can - I think I can I think I can--"

And he did! Very soon he was making his way towards the front-stage relevant VIP area loft with free access to unlimited Grey Goose alcohol, cranb juice, soda, OJ, and diet Red Bull.

Now he was at the front, and the little steam engine could make eye contact with his favourite DJ.

The DJ played, and throughout the whole set, the Little Raver who could continued 2 sing:

"I-thought-I-could! I-thought-I-could! I-thought-I-could! I-thought-I-could! I thought i could - I thought I could - I thought I could - I thought I could - I thought I could - I thought I could I thought I could --"


I am afraid my younger sibling is addicted to rave culture.


I am still trying to wrap my head around the entire EDM scene. Why is dubstep even more popular than the traditional indie rock that I listen to? It confuses me, but I guess I understand that young people don't want to listen to the same stuff that cool dads listen to. As much as I'd like to convince myself that indie rock is the best music on the planet, I have to be more tolerant when it comes to emerging generational gaps.

I am not young any more. Why do I feel this fraternal instinct for my little bro/sis, not just over their taste in music and cultural perception, but their general health and safety? Raves make me afraid of crowd control issues and drug control issues for the first time in my life.

Truth be told, I'm worried about my younger brother/sister. My parents were never really as 'hands on' as they were with me, so it was probably only a matter of time before the succumbed to some random subculture that involved drugs. Maybe 'being a raver' is the best case scenario so they aren't just some local drug kingpin in my parents' suburban development. However, I have a bad feeling that my little bro regularly hangs at the local drug kingpin's apartment.

But I guess I did the same thing when I was [age 13-20]. Drinking. Drugs. Going on meaningful road trips to music festivals and concerts. Hanging out with the ass-crack of society before I realized they were effing losers. I guess every one just has to grow up on their own, or something.

I can't tell if I should tell my parents that my younger sibling is a raver piece of shit, or if it doesn't even matter, and I should just let the kids have fun. Part of me is just concerned that my little sister is going to die at a rave from dehydration, heat exhaustion, crowd stomping, or go to jail due to a drug bust in a suburban apartment complex.

I'd like to believe that my sibling is 'smarter' than just another raver piece of shit wearing some dumb glow-in-the-dark outfit with an animal hoodie thingy. I'm not even sure if 'molly' is a real drug, or if it is basically a 'drug on training wheels.' Maybe that means it is a gateway drug to something even darker than 'doing drugs for the sake of a heightened social experience.'

When I went home for Thanksgiving, it was hard to listen to dubstep in my little brother's car and understand what the eff he was listening to.

I am worried. We aren't even really that close, but it's just hard to watch something from afar and know better than to get involved, but also not want to get involved, or something. I miss the days when all we cared about was watching TV together, not searching for a place in the subculture that authentically represented us.

Is it just a trend, or will my little bro/sis be a raver 4evr?


Photo via The Cobrasnake

nip slip
I go 2 raves
2 see the nips
of gurlz on drugz
Some call me the nip slip bandit
My eyes are like telescopes
infrared vision
searching for that white hot heat of a nip
slipping out from a bra, tube top, or tankie toppie

In that moment that I saw that nip slip
Everything Was Beautiful And Nothing Hurt
Everything Was Vibeful And Nothing Hurt▲▲▲▲▲▲
Everything Was Vibeful And Nothing Hurt▲▲▲▲▲▲▲▲▲
Everything Was Vibeful And Nothing Hurt▲▲▲▲▲▲▲
Everything Was Vibeful And Nothing Hurt▲▲▲▲▲▲
Everything Was Vibeful And Nothing Hurt▲▲▲
Everything Was Vibeful And Nothing Hurt▲▲▲▲▲
Everything Was Vibeful And Nothing Hurt▲▲▲
Everything Was Vibeful And Nothing Hurt▲▲▲▲▲
Everything Was Vibeful And Nothing Hurt▲▲▲▲

Goodnite, sweet vibes.

God Bless.

▲ ▲

Angry Mob of Los Angeles area ravers start riot at Electric Daisy Carnival movie premiere

What if I told u that some filmmakers debuted a documentary abt the Electric Daisy Carnival, and that the spirit of rave-wave vibes were so strong, that a MASSIVE RIOT started in the streets of Hollywood at the film's premiere? I don't know what it is abt EDC... They got tons of negative press after ppl died at their annual festivals, then they got ran out of town and forced to go to Vegas. But now some1 made a documentary abt the festival, then some electro house DJ was like "IM HAVING A FREE SHOW" [via twitter]. Tons of Los Angeles area electro tweens + aggressive bros came out, and they cops were like 'THERE'S 2MANYPPL [via 2manyDJs]!" and no1 wanted to leave bc every1 probably thought they were VIP, then when they found out that they weren't VIP, they started 2 riot.

A DJ set by Kaskade at the premiere of the Electric Daisy Carnival documentary, "Electric Daisy Carnival Experience," was shut down by police Wednesday evening in front of Grauman's Chinese Theatre when masses of fans spilled into Hollywood after Kaskade announced a live performance via Twitter. As the police attempted to disperse what turned into a huge gathering, crowds reportedly turned on the police and started throwing objects at them.

Soo many electro tweens. Maybe I should move 2 LA and become an alt DJ and become a 'God' bc I have 100k followers on twitter.

I heard all of those electro bros actually thought they were at a rave, so they went 'wild'n out' on the streets of LA.

Police said they were responding in force to several hundred people throwing bottles and other objects outside the premiere of the film version of a rave at Grauman's Chinese Theatre.

Several people jumped onto a squad car, but police said they could not confirm reports of a squad car on fire.

Poor dubstep bro. Seems like he just brought a CD binder and wants 2 vibe to some DJs.

Check out this bro... All he wants 2 do is rave. But the electro-h8ing 'pigs' are hauling him away.

Apparently some house DJ totally ruined this 4 every1.... Some bro named 'Kaskade'. In case u were wondering, he DOES have a soul patch.

Kaskade had tricked out a flatbed truck with his equipment -- and had planned to roll up, play two songs and head into the premiere, Los Angeles fire officials said. The event was permitted by the Los Angeles Fire Department, which planned a 30-minute lane closure of Hollywood Boulevard "with amplified music on the back of a flatbed truck," according to the permit.

About 2:30 p.m. Wednesday, Kaskade tweeted to his 92,000 Twitter followers that he was heading to Grauman's Chinese Theatre for a block party: "ME+BIG SPEAKERS+MUSIC=BLOCK PARTY!!!"

But as people began showing up, Duddie said it became clear that "a crisis was headed our way."

I might buy a 'flatbed truck' tricked out with DJ equipment, just to pick up 15 year old chicks at my local AMC movie theatres.

Anyways, the cops brought out some riot gear, and regulated on all of these ravers.

Whose side r u on?
#TeamRaveElectro or #TeamCityOfLosAngeles?
Do ravers need 2 behave?
Is 'electro' being glorified as 'the modern version of the punk movement', or are unregulated electro-fests actually a legitimate health and safety hazard that needs 2 be stopped?
Is it time 2 finally end the ELECTRIC DAISY CARNIVAL brand?

This may or may not be a metaphor for electro music's fight 4 acceptance in California.

PHOTOS: Cops bust some illegal rave in London, raver bros riot hard

Hey yall. I was chillin in London at some super underground rave, but then it went mainstream and the cops came 2 break it up. That's me in my palestinian scarf, vibing out, raging against society.

Let's just say we partied effing hard.

A number of officers were injured when bottles were hurled during clashes with a crowd of up to 500 youths at an abandoned former post office in central London.
Police desperately battled to calm the party but most of the people went back inside the building in High Holborn and continued partying.

Let's just say we 'effing crushed it.'

We 'raged' so hard that the 'pigs' were afraid of us. They just let us party cuz we're 'effing ballers.

One terrified officer said they were holding back because they did not want to cause any more trouble.
One officer said: 'We're hoping people will get tired and go home.' He said it was 'more trouble than it's worth' to cause a confrontation between police and party goers.

Felt awesome to transcend society's police. Feel like we really 'beat' society, even if it was just 4 one night.

We rode mad LSD waves. Heard that LSD is being branded by the same agency that does the GOT MILK campaign.

Some bros really 'got wild' and climbed on shit, took their shirts off, yelled at ppl. Worried that they 'rolled' 2 hard.

Feel like this rave was potentially not very hardcore because no1 died due to overdose/dehydration/getting trampled 2 death. Does California throw the best raves?

The Met said bricks were also thrown at officers as they attempted to disperse revellers. A number of buildings and vehicles were also damaged.
A number of buildings and vehicles were also damaged close to the eight-storey building, which is bordered by High Holborn, Museum Road and New Oxford Street.
Three people ended up needing hospital treatment, the force added.

The soundsystem 'crushed it'

Inside were 10 different 'arenas' with 30 sound systems, and 200 DJs playing through the night and day, he said.
He said this was the first such event in central London for nine years, adding: 'There will be a big resurgence of this sort of thing because of the economic situation. It's mirroring what happened in the last recession.
'It never went away but now it's a lot more in your face again. It's organic, it becomes its own life form.'

200 DJs. Seems like a lot of DJs. Wonder if they all have sweet DJ names.

Have u ever been 2 an underground rave?
Should the cops have 'riot squadded' this place and beat a few ppl to 'set an example'?
Should cops just let bros partie?
Does this rave seem 'legit' or 'legit lame'?
Should lawmakers enable police men 2 'burn every1 alive' if they are attending a rave?
Are raves 4 every1 or some sort of 'underclass' of society?
Do yall like techno haus?
Who has the best raves: California, Euros, Germans, England ppl, or ppl from Africa?

Bro creates a disco ball helmet, wears it to a rave

Just saw this bro convert a youth baseball helmet into an authentic disco ball helmet. Seems like he 'really knows where da party at.' Wanna vibe out with him, party on the go, hit up some raves, bang some bitches wearing nothing but my discoball helmet.  Might even install an IV that gets me 'fucked up' on acid/ XTC / pcp / meth /meow meow, pumping that shit directly into my brain.

Just want to feel protected from 'line drives', 'foul balls', and 'stray pitches.' Worried that i will be attacked by juggalos, but sorta still want people 2 know that I am 'down 2 party.' Need safety + something that takes my prsnl brand 2 the next level.

Do yall know how to convert a baseball helmet into a discoball?
Is the discoball helmet gonna 'catch on' at relevant raves?

Should I wear a The XX tshirt to a relevant music festival? [via The Dos Equises] Just wanna celebrate the Mercury Prize/being the most interesting man+buzzband alive.

Just wanna go 2 a rave
be young forever
even though I am 'getting heavier' in my mid-section
still gonna wear short shorts + rave gear

So many prsnl brands at raves...
Just wanna be free
have an absurd escape from reality
want to do drugs, party, listen to electro DJs
have my friends drop me off naked + unconscious on my parents' door step

Are raves the new 'music festivals'?
Should I have a discoball glued 2 my skull?
Does every 'good looking' raver have a 'hefty raver' BFF?
R yall tired of raves? Will they basically look the same forever?
Should raves cobrand themselves with ur regional 'marley fest'?

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