Trends | Hipster Runoff


Will the Egyptian D.I.Y. helmet become a relevant alt fashion trend in 2k11?

Photos via the guardian

From what I understand, there is some 'intense Iran-style anti-govt riots' going down in Egypt. Some say it is because the President shut down the internet, but I am not really familiar with issues that exist in the real world (especially the non American suburban Arab world), mainly just alt issues that exist on the internet. However, it seems like the #1 meme of the riots has been the zany helmets that protesters are wearing in order 2 protect themselves from bricks / bullets / bombs / miscellaneous projectiles.

DIY helmets seem like they might catch on in the USA/Euro indie scene. I could see a lot of people wearing a diy helmet to a relevant music festival, a Crystal Castles show, or even just to grab coffee at a local, relevant coffee shop. I think it will give non-fashion+design majors an opportunity to create something beautiful, utilizing a meaningulf arts and crafts type of process.

Have yall ever 'raged against the machine' in alt diy art & craft helmets?
Which 1 of these bros seems like he has the most alt helmet?

Sorta hope I can vibe out with some Diet Coke bottles on my head and start a relevant alt trend that sweeps thru the Eastern world, and eventually hits the west by storm (like digipets/tamagachis).

Maybe I can put a vintage record crate on my head / some sort of box that used to transport organic bananas to a local Whole Foods.

Seems like this bro is just vibin with some concrete on his head.

Pretty mainstream bucket helmet. Has been around since the 1970s.

Standard 'pot on head' bro. Used to do this 1 when I was like 2 years old.

Entry level cardboard box over head bro. Dude needs 2 step it up.

This bro seems 'mad alt' because he is wearing an alt Palestinian scarf (aka keffiyeh). He can also use the salad bowl to serve a healthy dinner later in the day.

What are you going to craft your diy alt helmet out of?
Should we go to a local dumpster to try to find helmet building materials?
Are diy helmets 'too freegan' for ur brand?
Should I start an alt helmet making shop instead of trying to start a buzzband / tshirt line?
Will the Western world 'steal' this trend, much like they stole the keffiyeh?
What is happening in Egypt?
Why is there so much trouble in the Arab world?
R u worried about World War III against the Arab world, or do u think we will win because we have better technology [via real helmets]?

Is the 'backbone' the sexiest part of a girl? [via skeletal definition]

Photos by Fatale Femmes

So many men
Are into 'tits', 'breasts', 'knockers', 'gargonzolas'
or 'asses', 'butts', 'cans', 'rumps', 'poopers'
But I kinnda want to be in2 something more alt

A body part that is rlly authentic
Represents dedication to your personal brand
Any1 can get 'tit implants'
or even 'ass implants [via Kim Kardash]

Lately I've been really in2 girls with amazing backbone definition

U can see every bone in the spine
Making u wonder 'how do they preserve their body with 0% body fat'?
'Is that even healthy?'
but then ur like 'who cares?'

Ur giving up 'big tits' and 'a round-ass ass' when u go 4 a skinny girl
but thinking of that sexy backbone
is all u need
2 get by
2 'get u off'

Wonder if it is more difficult to find a girl with a nice backbone
than it is 2 find a girl with a 'nice tits' / 'a nice ass'
Will we evr find the perfect alternative breasts?
or even discover the perfect alternative ass?

'Hip definition' seems chill, too

but there's nothing as metaphorically as 'sexy' as a girl with a nice backbone
A girl with a solid support system
A QT who can literally 'stand up 4 herself'

Oh backbone girl
Not sure how u did it
But u made me realize
that 'tits and asses' are overrated

Do backbones 'turn u on'?
R u hornie 4 backbones?
Are 1 piece floral print bathing suits gonna be 'huge' this winter?
Is objectifying a woman with tits + ass = mnstrm?
What is the sexiest body part on a female?
Is it 'unsexy' whenever a girl has a backbone/spine that is 'too defined' or does it demonstrate that they are dedicated 2 being skinny?

Protecting urself from Toxic Vibes @ Relevant Music Festivals

Photo via HoustonFreePress

Walking around
a relevant music festival
I don't usually venture outside of my 1 bedroom apartment
Usually just listen to buzzbands home alone in my undies
smoking dank
TV on mute in the background

Who will be the next emerging demographic to read HIPSTER RUNOFF?

Sometimes I get scared, scared that I can't stay relevant forever. Every day a new fan comes to my blog and reads it. Tweens grow up, search for self-awareness. Parents look for cool web content that gives them a perspective on the worldviews of their children. New fans 'stumble upon' HRO via tweet/facebooks/stumbling upon, etc. I wonder if with each new fan, HRO becomes a little bit less authentic.

Wonder if there is a 'new frontier' of readers who can be cultivated, converted into HRO loyalist. Fans who know how to chill. Readers who just want to be authentic.

Wonder if cats/kittens are the future of HRO readers.
Seems like they will be chill, and they can just mill around on top of their macbooks, vibing out, scrolling down the page, enjoying the blog for what it is--a blog.

So many ppl complain
"Carles, the commenters are soo annoying"
"Carles, the commenters try to sound just like u."
"Carles, every1 just tries to get first."
"Carles, u were relevant in 2k4"
"Carles, u need to post more music"
"Carles, ______ is not very alt"
"Carles, ur mainstream writings are brilliant, why do u waste time on buzzbands?"
"Carles, ur site is NSFW"
"Carles, ______ sux. They shouldn't be a buzzband"
"Carles, don't make fun of ______ for smoking dank."
"Carles, all u do is rely on a formula that isn't funny any more."
"Carles, why did u hire shitty writers to generate so much shitty content?"
"Carles, why do u keep pretending to retire?"
"Carles, u post too much"
"Carles, u don't post enough"
"Carles, where is the HIPSTER RUNOFF EP?"
"Carles, will u give me a job with HRO inc?"
"Carles, why are ur ads soo annoying"
"Carles, did u steal my weed?"
"carles, why r u so negative towards artists?"
"Carles, why r u such a _______?"
"Who the eff do u think u r?"

So many questions/concerns/h8rs/<3rs
So many messages
Sometimes I just don't know who I'm supposed to be as a blog
If I can just be 'me'
or if u want me 2 be 'some1 else'

So many expectations
Wish I could just escape
become a chill cat
with an owner who blows dank smoke in my face to 'get me high'

It's not easy being a blog.
What is the future of HIPSTER RUNOFF?
Is HIPSTER RUNOFF 'going down the shitter'?
Has HIPSTER RUNOFF 'peaked'?
What do u want to see more/less of on HIPSTER RUNOFF?
Is the HRO commenting community 'O.O.C.'? (out of control)
Do u h8 Carles?
Should Carles 'pass on the torch' to a new, exciting, aspiring young blogger?
In the future, will humans stop reading HRO?
In the future, will cats start reading HRO?

New Alt Trend: Putting a watch on ur shoes. Do ur feet need 2 know what time it is?

Photos by thefacehunter

My feet are the contraptions
that take me places
Sure there are cars, trains, subways, airplanes, boats
segways, hovercrafts, spaceships, teleportation terminals

But my feet are attached to me
and will be a part of me
until I get diabetes
and they will be amputated

My feet need 2 know what time it is
My feet need 2 know when to take me
to places that I need 2 go

Many people put their watch on their wrists
but I need a watch somewhere else
Looking down at my shoes
because I am nervous and humble
It's time
It's time 2 be me

elevating my personal brand
with watches on my shoes
h8 u shoelaces
could never tie u anyways

This is a new trend.
This is a new me
It is time 2 know where 2 go
It is time 2 let my feet
be in touch
with 'time'
a construct of society
but also something natural
Do u realize
we're floating in space
on a rock that is spinning
around a ball of fire
Even though we have years, months, days, hours, minutes, seconds
We will never really know
what time is time

My timeliness is my move

It's time to move forward
in2 the future

R u gonna put a watch / clock on ur shoes?

Should I put an indiglo on my shoes, or will I look 'poor'?

the places yall will go...
via Doctor SeussBro

Is this trend 'gonna take over' the shoe industry?
Do yall know how to tell time on an analog clock, or do u rely on digital clocks?
Do u use a watch or do u just check the time on your smart phone / cell phone /iPad?

Do u think girls who buzz off sections of their hair are sexie?

Photo by HelLooks

Have yall ever seen girls who have regular girl hair, but then they use men's clippers to shave off part of their hair? It seems weird to me, like they are trying to break free from some sort of societal norm. Women are supposed to have long, beautiful, healthy hair, so any time a woman has short hair, there is a 'backlash' agains them, since they are 'trying to be a man.'

Do u think progressive sectional buzz cutting of women's hair is sexy / authentic?
Feel like this trend is for a type of altbaguette who are more than just rich girls pretending to be alt / tragic.

Should I buy my GF a set of hair clippers for her birthday to 'send a strong message' that she needs to step up her game and buzz off some of her hair?

Seems like u can buzz any section of your hair, and it will make you 40-60% more interesting

Photo by the Sartorialist

Does n e 1 know if Rihanna is alt for buzzing off part of her hair, or is it less authentic when a black girl buzzes off their hair since their hair is 'less manageable' than the soft hair of a white woman?

Should I buzz off the majority of my GF's hair against her will?
alice glass haircut Pictures, Images and Photos

Should I just give her a sensible fade / wedge haircut with hair clippers?

What is the most authentic hair style for a woman? Are bangs still sexy, or did Zooey Deschanel 'kill' that trend?

Is it time for women to start buzzing of sections of their hair?
Should all women be required to shave their pubic hair?
If a girl shaves off part of her hair, do u think she is probably a dyke?
Will women ever become as powerful as men?
if Hillary Clinton had a buzz cut, would she have won the President of the World Vote?
Are women with short hair 'intimidating', or does it make u want to tell them to 'grow their hair out, stop wearing pants, and get in the kitchen'?

Does n e 1 know what kind of animal this is? Might get 1 embedded in my jacket.

Photo by Stil in Berlin

Hey yall. Just looking at kewl new trends. I just saw this little critter that is chilling on a bro's jacket, but it also might be integrated as a scarf. I feel like I could use a little creature who is an extension of me. A lot of people buy dogs, cats, fish, and other mainstream house pets, but I need something that is 'high fashion' not just some mutt that I have a personal connection to. Always searching for new and exciting ways to differentiate my personal brand, taking it to the next level.

Maybe I should get one of these mysterious creatures and sew him on to my Am Appy hoodie. Feel like that might differentiate me from 'every other tween wearing an Am Appy hoodie.'

Does n e 1 know what kind of animal this is? Rlly need to buy one.
a) fox
b) tiger
c) lemur
d) sugar glider
e) wombat
f) muskrat
g) rat
f) wildabeast
g) ferret
h) golden retriever
i) kitten
j) ice panda
k) an animal collective
l) mini-deer
m) Tasmanian Devil
n) armadillo
o) komodo dragon
p) manatee
q) beluga whale
r) Brooklyn sea otter
s) aardvark
t) Choose.Your.Own.Response

Really want to jump on the 'animal fur' trend while there is a backlash against it.

Does n e 1 know how I can create one of these critter accessories? Do I just go to PETCO and purchase a pet to hollow out?

Is it 'mean' to get a real animal and murder it/ hollow it out?
do animals really have rights, or is there no difference between the meat industry and the exotic fur industry?
Is there really such thing as animal cruelty?

R u allowed to pretend that your critter is a puppet, and have it talk to people about relevant issues?
Have u ever worn 'fur'?
Have u ever killed an animal?
R u good at zoology: the study of going on zoo field trips when ur a kid?

Should I stay in this weekend and get buzzed off Reddi Wips / nitrous oxide?

Photos by the cobrasnake

I feel like I want to try a new drug. Sorta want something that I can buy at my local store. Something more authentic than cough syrup, though. I want to feel happy, not groggy and retarded [via Lil Wayne].

Want to feel the temporary buzz of nitrous oxide from Whip Cream containers, then reward myself with the sweet taste of cream.

Just want to get fucked up out of a balloon, but not do heroin. Might sit in my van, and 'waste away' my life after high school.


Really want to get serious about using this drug. Might buy a starter kit at my local bong store.

Is it more alt to get 'effed up' on computer duster?

Just want to buy some balloons, get effed up with a bunch of losers at my rural college that is stealing my parents' money. Want to masturbate with Dorito dust fingers every night and get into relaishes with fat gamer chicks.


Need a new drug. Something more 'light hearted' and more readily accessible than weed/ cocaine / the horse / tussin / meow meow / etc.

Want a light hearted drug that fits in with my lifestyle. Wonder if computer duster is the same as Whip Cream cans.

Need to get 'lifted', then see what happens with my cute alt baguette friend [via scissoring]

Have yall ever done Whip Its?
Are they a light hearted drug?
Does the high last 4evr?
Have u put nitrous boosters in the back of ur car to make it go faster?
Is Cool Whip more alt than whip cream in a can?
Do yall like Whip Cream on top of ur hot chocolate / milkshakes / ice cream sundaes?

I am the modern ice cream man.

Photo by Yvan Rodic

I am the ice cream bro
with ice cream on my shoulders
hungry 4 sweet, frozen, creamy treats

I am not the man
driving a truck thru the poor part of town
selling ice treats to children
I am the modern ice cream man.

Still want to be as approachable as the mainstream ice cream man
might attach a boombox to my wardrobe
and play inviting music
letting people know
the Ice Cream Bro is coming

Ice cream. So many flavors.

Kinda represents how many different personal brands u can have.
Every1 has a different favourite flavor of ice cream.
No1 wants to be 'plain vanilla.'

So weird how u can make a metaphor about n e 1 with ice cream.
White people = vanilla
Black People = Rocky Road
AZNs = Ramen
Mexicans = bean and cheese
Gheys = rainbow sherbert
Jews = Latke ice cream
_________ = ____________

some people like ice cream
some people like froyo
also known as frozen yogurt

wonder if when i grow past my ice cream phase
then get 'health conscious'
if I will talk myself into being Froyo Bro

Might even start a self-serve frozen yogurt chain

encouraging people
to get crazy serving sizes
with even crazier topping selections

capn crunch
molten chocolate
reese's pb cups
fresh fruit
weird azn shit
human hair

might just buy a trusted froyo franchise like Pink Berry

might just buy a Baskin Robbins franchise

So many flaves

so many choices
so many ppl in this world

maybe ice cream
is what will set us free
cuz it represents
how we are all our unique flavor
unless ur into froyo
then u can just pour ur own cup
and add ur own custom toppings

Ice Cream Bro

Will ice cream shoulder pads be the hot new summer look?
What is more authentic: ice cream or frozen yogurt?
What toppings do u get on ur froyo?

Will hand warming sleeves replace the mitten / glove by Winter of 2k12?

Photo by the sartorialist

It seems like this has been the coldest winter ever, probably due to global warming. I feel like sometimes gloves / mittens / Zissou hats / pea coats / hoodies aren't always enough to keep u warm. As the Earth continues to grow colder, we will need to evolve and find functionally designed apparel that will legitimately keep us warm.

The handwarming sleeve is a perfectly designed tube meant to use your own body heat to keep you warm. The zone inside of the tube is a therapeutic sauna which can provide ur hands with the warmth they need to keep your fingers from turning to ice and breaking off ur hand / arm.

It perfectly insulates ur hands, and cultivates ur own warmth to keep u warm. Sometimes, life will require you to momentarily utilize the touch of ur hands / finger tips to accomplish tasks in cold weather.

Seems like even hunting bros who kill animals have utilized this technology.

I think that the handwarming sleeve brings the aesthetic of the fanny pack, but has more legitimate functionality.

Sorta also reminds me of ppl who keep their hands in the pockets of their hoodies in order to look humble / stay warm.

Can't believe NFL Quarterbacks have been into this hand warming trend for 20-30 years. Maybe Brett Favre is an innovator / thought leader on the field, and as a fashionista.

Quarterbacks require maximum hand warmth, even in cold climates. They must have a soft touch on the ball in order to throw tight spirals to their receivers. This may or may not be a metaphor 4 life.

Rlly need to order a hand warming sleeve from a sporting goods store / alternative retailer.

Free ur hands 2 do great things. The soft touch of ur fingertips will guide u 2 do great things.

Are handwarming sleeves the future of alt winter fashion?
Have u ever needed the touch of ur finger tips during the winter to finish some sort of outdoor installation / art project?
Are gloves / mittens 'mainstream'?
R u ready 4 summer?

Are soccer shin guards the new big trendy trend in alt fashion?

Photo by Yvan Rodic

I was reading relevant fashion blogs, and I couldn't help but notice an exciting new trend all around the world. So many people around the world are starting 2 wear shin guards, protective devices over their shins. Maybe it means we r at war, and we need 2 be protected, but maybe it is a tribute 2 the past.

Maybe we are trying to reconnect with our youth. I have read that soccer is the #1 youth sport in America. So many kids on so many fields all across the world, playing the 'beautiful game.' Youth sports are important in facilitating a 'normalized' American childhood.

Guess maybe we just want to get back to our 'field of dreams', running around in our bright uniform, eating oranges at halftime, running under a tunnel of arms created by our parents, getting to eat a snack after the game. All of these meaningful moments culminate with 'going out for a pizza party at the end of the season.'

Felt relieved that my parents weren't poor, and could always bring a 'sweet ass snack' for the team after the soccer game. Felt bad for poor kids whose parents didn't 'man up' and drop some dollars on a premium snack.

The quality of snack ur parents brought on your assigned day was generally indicative of their parenting philosophy, and how far u would get in life.

Not sure if I would be down with gogurt as a snack. Seems sorta gimmicky and 'half assed.'

Just want to go back in time, b4 my parents were divorced. Back when my dad still thought it was 'worth it' 2 stay with our family since we were young. Back we he was an 'assistant coach' 4 my soccer team.

Want to jam an orange wedge in my mouth, pretend it is a mouth guard, hope it protects me as I grow up and encounter new challenges in our world.

Shin guards, here 2 protect me. Here 2 take my brand to the next level.

So many different styles. just want to find some that match my personal brand. Hope Am Appy starts to manufacture them soon.

Maybe I will make my own conceptual shin guards, made from the bark of a sacred tree. WWACD (what would AnCo do?) // WWFFD (what would fleet foxes do?)

Sorta worried that the shin guard trend might be manufactured viral marketing for the upcoming World Cup in South Africa, sorta like Die Antwoord.

I miss the green grass
I miss the competition
I miss bonding with other kids, b4 I felt 'different' than all of them
I miss the bond between coach and player, father and son
I miss my 'soccer mom.'

Soccer Mom. She could do anything. Raise 2-4 kids with minimal emotional or physical support from our father. Get us to school, keep our grades up, and keep us 'enriched' with youth sports and miscellaneous community educational activities. I will not become you, mom. Not only because I sorta h8 what u represent, but also bc I am not strong enough 2 do what u did.

This trend is 4 u, mom and dad. I know u think I have grown up, and I just wear things arbitrarily in order to 'look cool.' Not this time. This means something to me. These shin guards r 4 u.

Will u start wearing shin guards?
Will shin guards be the next authentic alt trend?
Did u play youth sports?
Did ur parents prevent u from playing youth sports when they didn't have enough time?
Who will win the World Cup?
Is 'going out 4 a pizza party' as a kid one of the formative 'bro chill session experiences' in ur life?

Were the Ninja Turtles a marketing tool for the pizza industry?

Is the 'tube scarf' 2k10's first relevant alternative trend?

Photo by facehunter

I've been alive for a while. I have lived through so many different trend cycles and seasonal weather changes. It is always fascinating to see how our global meteorological climate can impact trends. As the weather rides waves of chill winds to winter temperatures, humans must find a way to 'stay warm', but more importantly 'stay in touch with relevant fashion trends.' Just because it is mad cold, doesn't mean u can sacrifice your alternative look.

It seems like the tube scarf is 'gaining steam' about becoming a solid option for alternative ppl who want to wear a scarf, but don't want to seem 'entry-level' about it. The bro in the picture really seems to be protecting himself from the elements, while looking 'like an interesting human being, based on the clothes he is wearing.'  I feel like the modern brand of the scarf is associated with a Jonas Brother/tween or something. Authentic humans must find a new form/function for the scarf, and you can see the flexibility of the tube scarf gives humans ultimate protection.

You can even bring the tube scarf over year head, so you don't have to look like boring ppl who wear 'lil beanies.'

Feel like I have read somewhere that humans want 'options'/flexibility, which is why Coca Cola makes multiple products.

Tube scarves seem to be an interesting, flexible look for both men and women. Like a trend that only 'bohemian consumers' could/would implement. Like some sort of high level band that only people who 'get' the alt scene would even know about.

Scarves are rlly dangerous territory though. I really want to stay warm, but I don't want to seem like I am 'trying too hard.'  Feel like suburban tweens wear scarves to 'look older'/seem like they are 'from the city.'

I will never forget the altstreamification of the keffiyeh/Palestinian scarf. Feel like I watched this trend evolve, much like a proud father watches his son grow into an NFL player.

Sort of wish I could be a mainstreamer/attempted-'hipster' who prematurely wore a scarf on a day when the temperature ranged from 59 degrees to 75 degrees.

Miss the era of girls learning how 2 crochet, then making ppl scarves as gifts.

Always start to 'giggle'/'scoff' whenever I see some1 of any age wearing a keffiyeh, the 'scarlet letter' of an entryleveler.

It is important to note that 'scarves' are simple items for manufacturers to make + get 'huge margins.' Really hope Target doesn't start manufacturing them.

Worried that an entry leveler will wear his Am Appy hoodie, a palestinian scarf, and a tube scarf all on the same day in 2k13.

I am happy that the tube scarf has given me the opportunity to strengthen my personal brand, and distance myself from winter accessory trends that have outlasted their 'useful livez.'

What do u use to keep ur neck protected from the elements?
Does a scarf fit in with ur brand?

Previous winter clothing coverage

Do yall think Old Navy fleeces will eventually 'come back' as an alt trend in a post-post-ironic way?

Are Foil Balloon Purses 'the next big thing'? Seems like a 'must have' item for the next year.

Photos via daylife// meme via trenddelacreme

All humans have belongings, and in order to transport our belongings, we must have some sort of compartment to carry these personal items with us. We must create portable space that is both fashionable and functional. This is why men and women carry 'purses', also known as bags-o-stuff. There is apparently a market for 'high end' purses, but many regular humans 'create their own purses.'

It seems like this new trend of FOIL BALLOON PURSES might take over all other D.I.Y.-themed purses in the next 1-3 years.  I hope that this will 'officially kill off' girls who buy/make purses that look like they were hand-crafted in 'the Third World.'

I have always been kinda baffled by foil balloons. They have sorta been branded as 'a shitty complement' to cheap flowers. Like u stopped at a grocery store, bought some flowers and a foil balloon, then went to give a gift to some1 you don't really love and doesn't understand why a foil balloon would be 'hella insulting.' Like a grandmother, a kid under the age of 10, or possibly a tweenage girlfriend who 'carried around her foil balloon proudly on Valentine's Day.'

Honestly would only buy a foil balloon for a 'baby'

a tween who I wanted to 'feel up' at the mall

or possibly a relative who was about to die.

I am truly amazed by the foil balloon's transition into this year's hottest fashion item.

There are just so many possibilities to create something beautiful with foil balloons. I really feel like I can take my brand 2 the next level with a 'Dora the Explorer' foil balloon purse.

Should I make a purse for my next 'GNO' [via girls nite out]?

Really need 2 be an 'early adopter' to this trend. Worried that mainstreamers will catch on to this within 2 months, kinda like how they 'stole shutter shades'/wayfarers/every good band.

I am excited about making my own foil balloon purse this weekend. I am not sure which balloon I should buy. I am not sure which foil balloon will be 'me' enough. I might actually start a 'foil balloon purse conversion' business in order to capitalize on this new trend.

I think that I will be very 'now'/'culturally relevant' if I make a balloon out of Balloon Boy's balloon. Really need to check ebay to see if I can buy a little bit of the original foil balloon print. Sounds like a challenge straight out of 'The Runway Project' television show.

We must realize that we are living in a post-balloonboy world. It's kinda weird how violated we feel after a lil family from Colorado violated our trust. For 3 hours, we thought we were watching a lil boy abt to die, but then we figured out his parents had jammed him in a box in the attic.

Creating a foil-balloon purse will mean that you are willing to let the world know that you are a victim. You are not afraid to display your pain and use fashion as an effective way to comment on the modern human condition. You will create a foil balloon purse. You will give your world a window to your pain. Your personal brand will be both 'fashionable' and 'vulnerable.'  You will be in touch with humanity.

Will u create a foil balloon purse ASAP?
How long until we see 'relevant partie pix' with foil balloon purses?
Will foil balloon purses be the next shuttershades/rcrd hats/child predator glasses?
Are foil balloons/FBPurses 'fucking stupid'?
Do u think that they will 'hold up'?
R u going to throw down an 'arts and crafts' session this weekend?
R u 'pissed' at balloon boy? Do u h8 'the media'?

Seems like this photo was taken at some sort of 'cultural arts festival' where they were creating a series of foil balloon purses.

Please feel free to send your foil balloon purse pix to Carleser [at] (no uggos plz)

Feeling so 'violated' in the post-balloonboy world. Not sure who 2 trust any more. Not sure what's 'real' and what is 'bullshit.' Alone.

Which arts and crafts experiment will take ur brand to the highest level?

Hey yall,
As u know, I am a huge fan of self-expression [via arts and crafts]. It's like you can take any object and convert it into another more meaningful object, and the transformation process will give you an outlet 4 all of ur thoughts, hopes, and desires. For those of u who didn't go to a school that had arts+crafts activities, u can basically take household items and turn them into functional objects that look kewl.

I was browsing some of the world's most relevant fashion & trend blogs, and saw some kewl arts + crafts that I thought I should 'shine a spotlight on.' If u ever have any interesting craft ideas, please leave them in the comments. I honestly believe that we will only be able to find happiness through self-expression, through some method of design. But if ur not properly educated in 'design', then all u can really do is 'arts and crafts.'

Art + Craft #1: Showing ur faith in The Lord by Creating a safety pin t-shirt for him (a Justice t-shirt)

Photo via thefacehunter

This bro clearly 'loves the Lord', and wanted to make a shirt that was a tribute to our Lord Saviour Jesus Christ. Not every1 is able to mass produce shirts with designs on them, so sometimes you need to take whatever you have around the house and 'make it work.' Sometimes I will squirt toothpaste on my t-shirts in kewl lil designs instead of actually buying a t-shirt that has stuff on it 4ever.

I might make this shirt as an 'activity' with the community Bible Study group that I lead called Teens4Christ.

Art+Craft #2: Rat Tail Extension Kid

Many of yall are familiar with 'rat tails', but u probably didn't know that you could have them on any part of ur body. All u really need to do is create a rat-tail extension kit with safety pins and human hair. This is similar to black women who wear 'weaves', except this is for alternative people. It seems like if you put a rat tail in an 'unexpected place', u will get a better reaction. I have a feeling that 'safety pins' might be one of the most important fashion accessories of the next decade.

Kinda turned on by this, like I would want a girl to use a safety pin + rat tail extension as a clitoris piercing.

Art+Craft #3: A shirt with ur own face on it

Photo via YvanRodic

I am not sure if this is a look for every1, particularly if you are ugly. It seems like ugly people might want to wear a shirt with some1 else's face on it, but that also might make the person seem 'uglier.' This shirt is bold, letting the world know that u are truly 'all about U.' I feel like u have 2 be artistic 2 execute this shirt, or else u will end up looking like a crappy doodle.

'This bro is me.' - u, 2009

Art+Craft #4: Building a body suit out of duct tape and aluminum foil

Photo via drunkenstepfather

I feel like this look might only work for 'curvy ass bitches.' It seems like some1 else might have to make it for you by wrapping your body in duct tape. U might only be able to wear it once.

Art+Craft #5: Metaphorically Lynching urself

I have always wanted to show the world how much pain I have inside of myself, but without 'actually killing myself.' It seems like I don't actually want to kill myself, because that wouldn't really be noticed by enough people, unless I went on 'some sort of death rampage.' I feel like I might build an art+craft where I 'lynch myself', and make it seem like I am dead in public. As if I am Jesus Christ or something, and I was murdered by tons of people who don't 'get' me.

I love 'living' 2 much 2 kill myself, but I really just want the world 2 know that they don't 'get' me. I want them 2 know that they are slowly killing me.

Just want 2 create shit
& express who I truly am
2 the world around me
looking at me
analyzing me
interpreting me
'u don't fckng know me'
'u don't fckng get me'
'I nvr thought I'd die alone.'

do u know n e fun arts+crafts activities?

Is 'sagging' back as a relevant trend?

Photo via lookbooks

I remember when gangster rap came out, there was a trend called 'sagging.' Basically, u let your jeans/pants 'sag' below ur ass, showing off your underwear. It seemed like if you were a 'sagBro', it meant that you were somehow affiliated with a 'gang.' For those of you who don't know, 'gangs' were packs of minorities who banded together to brand themselves as 'violent hoodlums', and often got into disputes with other 'gangs' within their community. The wave of 'gang violence' inspired tons of films by 'deep' minority writers and directors, who wanted to present obvious/'progressive' ideas about life in the poor part of town. Most of these movies ended with a 'tragic death' by a minority who 'had potential' but succumbed to the 'disease of the streets' since community members killed 1 another instead of helping 1 another.

N e ways... It seems like 'sagging' might be a new trend that catches on, perhaps as a tribute to 'the way things used to be.'

These minorities seem to be 'trendy.' Not sure if they are 'authentic saggers' or if they are part of the recent post-ironic sag revival.

This bro seems 'innovative' for finding a way to make his skinny jeans sag. Sagging seems to say 'i don't care about the form/function of the traditional pant technology.'

It seems important to have 'nice underwear.' A lot of saggers utilized Loony Tunes boxers, or Tommy Hilfiger branded boxers. Not sure if I would wear something as simple as Old Navy boxers. Might utilize Am Appy briefs.

I srsly hope that 'sagging' is embraced by public school systems now that the gang-wave is over.

I am excited about this new era of sagging. I feel like it will give me an opportunity to rebrand my image without spending too much on new clothes. It might make me seem 'more ethnic'/like I am in touch with minority trends, and possibly help me look like I have a 'global perspective.' Not sure how sagging started. Seems not very functional, but still sorta stylish.

Just worried that I will be sent home from school if the hall monitor catches me. :-(

Do u think that sagging is 'back'?
Do u know if 'gangs'/'gang violence' still exist or do minorities just 'play video games' instead now?

This is a post about hoping that sagging catches on with keut females with 'nice asses.'

Should I start a business utilizing only Am Appy's latest product 'the bag-o-scraps'?

via am appy store

I was browsing the Am Appy store, and I found a kewl new product called 'the bag o scraps.' I think that the concept behind the product is that you can 'create your own meaningful arts and crafts' using Am Appy material/the exclusive Am Appy colour/design palette. Like if you can't afford a real Am Appy t-shirt, you could glue together these scraps to make ur own unique one. Or if you are a free-spirited girl, u can 'let ur imagination run wild' while creating some thing 'beautiful' with the bag-o-scraps.

It seems hard to run a clothing manufacturing company, like there is all of this 'extra shit' left over, but u don't really know what to do with it. Then u hire some 'alternative arts+crafts consultants' to come in with some 'fresh ideas' about how you can brand this waste. Seems like u are just 'jonesing 4 money' in anyway possible, trying to 'liquidate inventory' and 'reduce the bottom line' by 'creating brand synergy' and 'manufacturing efficiencies' while keeping 'fixed costs at a minimum' and creating a 'progressive business culture' where 'ideas are incubated' and ur 'vertically integrated corporate structure' is able to 'make huge margins.'

The bag-o-scraps sorta reminds me of how barbecue restaurants invented a product that is a sandwich made out of the leftovers from beef scraps and the leftover meats that have a 'high fat content.'

The Chopped Beef BBQ sandwich is made up from the scraps and leftover fat cuttings from the 'premium beef products.' They are able to mix all of this 3rd class waste with barbecue sauce, and sell it like it is a 'special recipe', but the people who eat it are actually 'eating pig slop.' It seems important to only eat 'white meat' and possibly red meat that has a 'reasonable fat content.' But I think in America, ppl like to eat unhealthy stuff, and take pride in it.

(What is ur fave kind of BBQ?)

It seems difficult to run a business efficiently. I feel like ideally, there would be no 'leftover scraps' to salvage. But maybe the bag-o-scraps is sorta a lesson about life. Not everything is going to be a perfectly tailored t-shirt in a unique colour sold at an above-market price because ur buying a 'quality brand.' Sometimes u have to take what life gives you--a bag-o-scraps-- and turn it into something beautiful. Maybe life is just a bag-o-scraps, and the individual scraps are the people/mp3s/blogsites/social networks/tweets that make U who U R as an individual.

Might buy a bag-o-scraps and open up an etsy store/ebay thrift store. Seems lucrative. Might open a BBQ restaurant.

'Matter can neither be created nor destroyed. It may be rearranged in space, and changed into different types of particles, and utilized to create meaningful arts, crafts, and branded products.'
-God when creating the Bag O Scraps

Previous Am Appy Coverage

[Kanye West Shops at Am Appy] [Am Appy Swine Flu Mask] [Am Appy Black Guy Employee] [Product Packaging Analysis] [Am Appy undies with cock pic] [Afrikaan products at am appy] [Am Appy Products that are easy 2 <3/h8]

Do u have n e good ideas 4 making shit with the 'bag o scraps'?
Do u know if Am Appy cloth is 'the same as a condom' if u wrap it around ur penis and penetrate ur lover?
Does n e 1 know where I can buy Hollistercrombie bags-o-scraps?

Still searching 4 my SUMMER LOOK: Football Shoulder Pads?

Photo via glamcanyon

I was looking for summer looks, and I noticed this bro wearing huge athletic shoulder pads. I think that they are supposed to be 'protective.' Might be inspired by 'all of the drama in Iran.' Like the whole world is about to turn into 'a massive battlefield', and we all have to be prepared for 'riot police'/'nuclear weapons being dropped.'

I kinda feel relieved that Obama is in office now. If George W. Bush was in office, he would probably make us 'nuke' Iran, and we would probably have to go to war with them. Would be hella worried about 'getting drafted.' Not sure if I want to be drafted into a war. No sure how that would go. Wonder if the military camps would have wifi. Wonder if I could take my Macbook, or if I could only use compys in compy labs. Wonder if I could still download relevant mp3s from mp3 blogs.

I don't wanna be drafted, yall. :-(

N e ways... Think that football pads seem pretty 'alt' in our modern world, but might become 'mainstream' soon. Might buy some 'leopard print' leggings to set myself apart. Just looking for a summer look.

Sorta reminds me of the most alternative bro of all time, John Alt.

Do yall have any good ideas 4 summer loox?

Will fannypacks be this summer's break-thru fashion accessory?

Photo via SBTVC

Still searching for my 'summer look.' I know that fanny packs have been something 'ironic' to mention since the beginning of time. But srsly yall...I think that fanny packs are actually really functional now that I have finished my design school curriculum. I was fortunate enough to major in Product Design & Engineering, and had a class taught by the guy who designed the first generation iPod Shuffle.

I feel like soon, ppl will want to carry 'less belongings' than ever. All u really need is ur debit card and ur smartphone. We will soon eliminate pockets, and either have specially designed pouches for specific items, or perhaps some sort of 'camelbak' that you can fill with the beverage of ur choice.

I'm not very creative, but I do come up with good ideas sometimes. Sorta wish that bars would sell pre-loaded camelbaks full of beer / well drinks / sparks / etc. Feel like it would make business more efficient, and decrease 'foot traffic' within the bar, allowing people to enjoy themselves' even more. U could even encourage people to 'bring in their own huge container.' Might just use a camelpak because I am worried about dehydrating in the summer sun.

Yall... I'm just looking for a better way to live--and I think the best way to improve your life is to bring as many 'kick ass products' as possible into your life. I don't really understand why 'we were put on this Earth', but I do know that u can do whatever is in ur power to make urself look kewl/have a 'functional wardrobe.'

might buy an iPhone 4.0

Previous Fanny Pack Coverage

"The Arm."

Photo via lookbook

It's weird to see girls when they have their arm in a 'fancy bag holding position.' It seems like they have a lot of 'attitude.' While I have seen this arm-position being utilized in photographs of famous celebrities skanks-who-are-in2-fashion, I feel like I have seen this pose more often in 'lil cunts' who are 'middle-upper-class but think they are rich. [via suburbia]' Girls who are 'into fashion' and 'just want to seem really deep/cunty-in-a-cool-way.'

It's weird to see people in public who 'act like they are famous' or something. Feel like people are 'seriously disturbed' when they have mannerisms + personal branding decisions that can only be appropriated to 'some1 trying to seem the way a famous person would act.' Need 2 start exploring how 'fame' makes me feel more often.

I'm not sure if having ur arm in this cunty purse-holding position is a functional decision. I feel like this pose is often used when ur holding a large, heavy purse, so it is possibly a matter of 'properly balancing a load.' It seems like the broad might have to use her elbow to 'keep the purse pushed back' so that she can 'showcase her outfit.'

Seems like something that 'high fashion bitches' do.

Seems like a 'fad' that 'cunts' copy thereby spreading 2 suburbia.

Feel like it might actually 'be functional' if you are a 'very small woman.' But in that case, you should consider a 'back pack.'

Sorta just wish women would buy ergonomically designed purses. Feel like women need to make better decisions being able to carry a baby in one arm, and baby supplies in the other.

It's hard for me to understand why women need 2 carry 'so much shit.' I think they are insecure and 'worry too much' about how they look. Also possibly are worried about 'getting/looking old' too much. I wish that women who were obsessed with 'life being terminal' would have a child, and shift their focus to 'caring for a lil person who came out of their wombs.' I think that is actually part of eVolution/the Circle of Life.

Feel very worried about women, and the stress that they are putting on their bodies. Not sure if having 'the arm' is a good personal branding choice. I think that there are a lot of things wrong with the concept of a 'purse' in the modern world. Feel like women should try to be more like men, and just carry a wallet in their ass-pockets or something. Maybe they would 'feel more equal' and 'less weighed down.'

Worried about the spinal cords of lil girls carrying bags that are too heavy. Wish a designer would come along and change everything. Wish men and women were 'truly equal.'

Will Wolf T-shirts be this summer's breakthru fashion item?

This post is part of a continuing summer fashion series in which Carles from HIPSTER RUNOFF searches for the most authentic way 2 express urself [via fashion] during the hot summer months.

Photo via GorillaVsBear

I was looking at the popular alternative mp3 blog, GorillavsBears, and I noticed that the GorillaVsBro took some pictures of popular conceptual musician Panda Bear, aka stage name "Noah Lennox", from the band Animal Collective. I saw that he was wearing a shirt that looked pretty kewl. The shirt featured several wolves 'chilling.' I thought it might be a t-shirt for a band that was named 'Wolves' or 'Wolf Collective' or something, but it was actually just a shirt promoting the generic wolf brand. Wolves for Wolves' Sake.

I feel like it might be a modern take on the famous 'child predator glasses' trend. It is a look that says 'I am a bro who values different things than u. I live in a different world than u, and I am not searching for the same things in life than u r. I am part of some sort of collective of animals who don't care about material things' and so forth, and so on... Sort of like how child predators 'just wanna get off with kidz', WolfBros 'just want to be a part of nature' or something like that. Roaming the earth.

It's weird how we are in this Am Appy era of solids + stripes, but it might be time to 'break free' from this minimal branding, and start wearing t-shirts with various nouns on them, represented via images (no words).

Srsly. The more I see Wolf t-shirts, the more it 'makes sense.'

Seems like 'wolf' might be my power animal [via the Fighting Clubs]

Wolf Altbro #1

Wolf Altbro #2?

Wolves roam together in packs, sort of like how I envision a 'perfect scene' where every1 gets along and there is no 'drama'

Wolves can also be 'lone bros' who 'just chill by themselves' and are 'happy' with a life of solitude

Not sure about what type of personal brand these shoes are 4

Photo via theblowtorch

Yall. I feel confused when I see these Nike gladiator shoes. I think that they are supposed to be 'athletic' but also 'trendy.' I am not sure if they were designed to give your feet/body adequate support. I think it might be for people who are 'only interested in looking kewl' but also possibly for 'people who play xtreme sports.' Haven't really followed Xtreme Sports since Tony Hawk died in a skateboarding accident-prank with Tom Green.

These gladiator Nikes are for:
a) streetwear urban bros
b) streetwear urban bros from suburbia/Los Angeles
c) LeBron James
d) Kobe Bryant
e) replacing the 'chill soccer sandal'
f) going to build a time machine and sell them 2 actual gladiators
g) something about the show "AMERICAN GLADIATORS"
h) wrestlers [via Mickey Rourke/Brooke Hogan]
i) boxers [via Manny "Pac Man" Pacquiao]
j) the homosexual demographic
k) the now-defunct 'metrosexual' demographic
l) bros who wear Ed Hardy
m) bros who want to look chill but also be ready to fight
n) giving away for free at Coachella Pool Partie
o) black people
p) Choose.Your.Own.Response

Confused about gladiator sandals/shoes.

Not sure who I even am any more, and what brand represents me the most/best.

Should I get a bowl mullet? [SUMMER LOOKS]

Photo via the cobrasnake

I'm searching mad hard for a summer look, yall. Just need to 'keep it fresh.' I am sort of looking for something that fits in with the modern world--not trying to copy aesthetics from the past several years. Thinking about getting some sort of bowl cut, but then also possibly having 'a lil tail' in the back [via mullet]. I just want people to know that I am 'willing to adapt' to trends, and that I'm not really stuck with just 1 mediocre look.

This summer, I think I want to be 'post-sexual', maybe a little bit like an androgynalt. Don't want people to know what sex I am. I want ppl 2 b attracted to me for 'what's on the inside' and not because of bullshit biological factors like 'gender' and 'sexual organs.' I just feel like we need to start realizing that you can make love with any1 if we want to have peace in the Middle East. We need to stop worrying about bullshit societal and biological norms.

But srsly yall, do u know any good summer looks? Wonder if gladiator sandals will come back--saw them selling some at WalMart.

Should I just go to the gym to 'get ripped' then buy some board shorts and get a summer job as a lifeguard?

If I get a record hat, will it melt in the sun if I wear it to a pool partie?

Yall I need yalls help. do u know any good 'summer stores' other than the local thrift store "The Old Navy"?

Flags are metaphors worth protecting.

I was looking at pictures of hotties, and then I 'got kinda pissed.' I hadn't felt an emotion in such a long time. Had been feeling 'numb' and shit. But then got 'enraged.'

Saw these two laggards laying around on my flag. This is America. This is our flag.

Photos via Bad Kitties

I feel 'fucking enraged' that some1 would deface my flag like that. I feel like this is what people in Iraq and Iran do whenever George W. Bush makes bad foreign policty.

It rlly offends me 2 see some super model/it-girl wearing our flag as a muu muu to a meaningful music festival. I know that fashion is metaphorical, but I don't think u should be allowed 2 wear a flag-shirt unless ur American, and unless it is [via Old Navy].

srsly think that this is a metaphor for the economie. Feel like young people are 'lazy' and 'don't give a shit about the economie.' This is like Generation Y, hangin out, layin around on Old Glory.

I think that the British flag might actually be a 'fashion statement.'

Sort of scared that the South will rise again [via Radical Christian bros who buy guns at Walmart]

I think it's kewl that even 'the dark side' of the world is a lil bit nationalistic. Think that we should limit their levels of 'patriotism' so that it doesn't cause terrorism.

Yall. I've been feeling really down lately. Just like 'fuck everything' and feelings like that. I decided that if u don't care about any thing, ur life will never be meaningful. Even though it is cliched, u have 2 FEEL something. U can't just go through life thinking that everything is a big joke. U have 2 take stuff seriously so that u don't implode.

It's okay to take stupid stuff seriously. Sometimes that makes life fun. Think I'm gonna change my ways and rally around America/God/bad ass mp3s/ 'the scene'.
What do yall believe in? What do yall do 2 get out of ruts?

Are slashed jeans the new 'skinnie jeans'?

Trying to stay on top of trends. I have been seeing a lot of people with jeans that are 'slashed the fuck up.' I think that this might be fashionable. I think that some people do this because they think that it 'legitimately makes them look cool', but other people do it because it is 'fucking ridiculous. I feel like it might be reasonable to slash your jeans at the knees, especially if you are like some sort of laborer who tiles floors, or does stuff that involves a lot of bending at the knee joints.

I think I feel worse when I see a bro/tween girl in 'slashed up jeans' than when I see one in 'excessively faded' jeans. Not sure if I'd rather have fade lines/slashes/ or just general regions of faded slashes.

Sort of want to cut slits at the tip of my pant legs so that the jeans fit around my boots [via crombie mainstreamers]. Might buy jeans that are 'too big' and I will wear down the heel-area of my jeans, making me look more rugged. It's always funnie 2 imagine lil azn kids in Asian island nations/Mexico 'fading' jeans and 'cutting them' to make them seem more rugged.

I hope they are being paid as much as Am Appy workers. Wish that they could file for a transfer or something. I think poor ppl in America 'take America for granted.' From what I understand, most poor Americans spend the majority of their welfare checks in the Electronics & Entertainment section of Wal Mart.

Not sure how to feel about pants that are 'slashed the fuck up', though. I'm not sure if you can redeem those pants at Buffalo Exchange/ur local thrift store without losing a lot of value. (My friend who graduated from Fashion Skewl is in charge of 'buybacks' at Buff Ex.)

Photo via lookbook

Damn. Kinda feel like making a joke about a 'weed wacker' or something 'lame' like that.

This has been a post about not helping ur dad do yard work, and staying inside on your computer, feeling angry that the lawnmower is so loud and u can't hear the music that ur trying 2 listen 2. This has also been a post about underpaid laborers.

Sorta miss stepdad jeans/standup comedian jeans / mom jeans.

Should I wear a VHS tape around my neck [via 'favourite childhood movie']?

Photo via thecobrasnake

Yall. Saw some bro wearing a VHS tape around his neck, kinda like a necklace. I remember when bros used 2 wear record hats, other alts wore cassette tape necklaces, and some other bro wore a postcard necklace. I wonder what movie he has around his neck. Probs something like The Goonies or Getting Even With Dad or something zany like Pete & Pete Bros. Would be pretty authentic if he had something like 'a snuff film' around his neck, or maybe some sort of vulnerable childhood film that u could show 2 people that ur in a relationship with 2 make them 'feel closer' 2 u.

Need 2 convert more dated technology into 'fashionable items.' Might start wearing a USB drive around my neck, like I work in the IT industry.

Feel weird when people 'watch movies' and 'love them.' Sort of feel sad when I see bins of DVDs for $2 each, especially when I used to think that 'the movie experience was valuable.' Wonder where the magic of the movies went? Wonder what the carbon footprint of 'the movie industry' is. Probably almost as bad as driving a car or something.

I might just paint a mural of every single alt/authentic/quirky-core movie character who has ever been in some sort of relevant indie film / 'cult classic' / dark comedy.

Who would yall put on ur 'dream mural' of every relevant character?
Would all of the Tenenbaums fit on ur mural?
Would the 'fucking stupid Mexi' from Napoleon Dynamite 'make the cut'?
Would any African Americans be on ur mural?
Should I get a tattoo that says 'CriterionCollecBro'?
Are yall excited about Summer Movies? [via Will Smith/Johnathan Depp / Nick Cage]

Monitoring Emerging Trends: Socks with Sandals [via Chloe Sevigny]

Photo via JustJared

Yall. I was at Coachella this weekend, and I got to see some of my favourite kewl celebs who are 'into music' and know how to 'not wear makeup so that no1 recognizes them.' It must be interesting and fun to be a celebrity. U kinda just wanna chill out in public and have people look @u and recognize u and want 2 be u but u also 'want people 2 leave u alone' so that u can experience the same stuff that 'normal people' do, like music festivals and wearing ur chillest sun wardrobe.

Saw popular 'indie movie starlet' Chloe Sevigny at Coachellers. She was wearing sandals, but she had on white socks underneath. I think it's the thing where some1 who is a 'trendsetter' does something that is a 'fashion sin' and 'make it seem kinda kewl.' Not sure if this means I have to buy sandals and socks to wear underneath them. Might just be a trend for entrylevel tween females with lookbooks.

Apparently sandals are really bad for your hygiene, and usually don't even provide u with proper support. Should probably buy some 'shoes for old people' or something.

Does n e 1 know if Chloe Sevigny is still authentic? Kinda hope she does some more romantic comedies and 'goes into the mainstream' but I'm not sure if mainstream girls would 'want to look like her' or if mainstream bros would 'think she is hella hot, yo.'

sorta wish this was a blog post about Sandra Bullock in her prime. (miss u Keanu)

'don't stop this bus' -the movie SPEED


Yall I feel Clueless
walking around coachy
hope I don't get a disease
I think that's actually how
kids in Africa transmit a lot of diseases

Does n e 1 else miss when images of consumerism and rich white people were 'simple.'

Miss when we didn't have to 'resent white ppl' s0 hard.

Chloe Sevigny

Alternative Celebrity, Alternative Entrepreneur

Chloe Sevigny is an alternative actress and model. She is famous for 'being alt hot' and giving Vincent Gallo a BJ on camera.

Read more>>>>

Might not find girls who wear Am Appy to be 'hot' n e more.

Yall. I remember the days when I would totally 'get a hard on' when I saw a girl wearing Am Appy. Whether it was a pair of leggings, a 'deep ass' v-neck, a pair of briefs on a lezbo core broad, or even just a bright coloured t-shirt, I always thought a girl who was wearing Am Appy was just as hot as one of the Am Appy models.

Feel like I'm growing up and valuing different things about a woman. Have yall ever made a new wardrobe out of nontraditional items, like 'wearing duct tape 2 prom' or something zany like that? Have yall ever made a body-suit from the skin of fat women?

Not sure if I'm even gonna wear Am Appy n e more. Might just start wearing the Am Appy bag. Need to brand myself better with Helvetty + something that showcases my body.

All I want 2 do
is live in 1 of the cities on the Am Appy bag
Settle down
Start a family
Be the person I want 2 be
and grow old without feeling old
Getting more meaningful with each passing day

Kinda sad. Not even sure what I think it 'hot' any more.
Might just start looking at 'a ton of porn'
because it's good 2 know that some girls 'just want 2 get pounded'
and only consider themselves' to be 'lil fuck holes'

What do u look 4 in a woman?
some1 who looks like Jessica Alba?

What is the most authentic portable gaming device necklace?

Photo via Facehunter

Yall. Just saw this blipster wearing a necklace with a Game Boy on it. I wasn't born when these gadgets were around, but I know that they were a pretty big deal. Kinda weird when people apply the whole 'vintage' mindset 2 technology. U assume that things 'continue 2 get better', but some people prefer aesthetics from the past. Kinda weird.

What portable gaming device would u use as a necklace?
a) PSP
b) Nintendo DS
c) Gameboy
d) Gameboy colour
e) Game Gear
f) blue Game Gear
g) Portable DVD player
h) Tamagachis
i) an iPhone with no music or service, but just games
j) a Super Nintendo tied around ur neck
k) a Wii controller
l) the band 'the Ataris'
m) Choose.Your.Own.Response

Hope that the increased demand for these old machines doesn't make the price go up. Need 2 get a good deal on ebay.

Previous HRO video game analysis

Teens are s000 impressionable

It's kinda weird how trends manage to 'catch on' as quickly as they do. All it really takes is some1 famous 'doing something' that 'sets them apart from the crowd', and the next thing u know, so many teens and tweens are copying the trend.

Take for example the Aretha Franklin big bow Obama Inauguration Hat meme.

It was actually more important than the actual ceremony, and probably more revolutionary than Obama's actual election. She really stole the spotlight from what was supposed to be Obammy's weekend. According 2 the most important bloggers and zany-news-generators, Aretha was the biggest story of the inauggy partie.

The next day, teens across America were looking 4 a way 2 be different. The path towards individuality had been laid out b4 them [via putting a big bow on shit].

Photo by Lookbook

Need 2 think about how I can convert my v-neck collection into 'something that makes me look modern.' Might put big bows on my clothing/Macbooks. Maybe just a Crystal Castles logo. Not sure if I actually 'believe' the bro in the picture, and think he might be some sort of performance piece, sort of like 'The Tween Version of Joaquin Phoenix.'

Kinda wish I could invent a fashion that 'went viral', kinda like shuttershades, or maybe even slanties, or maybe even the classic 'slept over at my bf shirt', or maybe even 'being a Jonas Bro'/Creating.Your.Own.Jousteece.Jacket.

Do yall know any trends that I need 2 b on the lookout 4?
Have yall ever 'copied a famous celebrity' 2 seem more like an individual?

Should I buy a fixed gear bike?

Photo via HiStyley

Yall. I saw this bike, and wondered if it was a fixed gear, or 'just a cruiser.' Have yall heard of fixed-gear bikes? Does n e1 know how they work, and why people buy them? Feel kinda like it might be more advantageous to have a bike with multiple gears, but I think sometimes 'subcultures' can develop out of people 'being unreasonable.'

I think with only 1 gear, u have to do more work in order to ride ur bike fast. Might be some sort of new age weight loss gimmick, kinda like what 'large people' will do in order to shed some calories. Not sure how useful

One time I saw a group of fixed-gear alts riding around Austin, Texas with Lance Armstrong. Made me wonder if Lance is using fixed gear technology to win the Tour De France.



Thought about buying a bike for $2000, but then I just bought a used Kia and drove it into a lake. Made a video of it for my Senior Art Project, just cuz it was 'a metaphor' about 'spending/wasting money on transportation' and also 'moms who drove their kids into lakes 2 commit suicide with them.'

Does n e 1 know if biking 'saves the environment', or does it just 'create more traffic problems/dangers since bikers don't respect the rules of the road?'

Does n e 1 else 'like to ride bikes'? Or do u live in a city [via suburbia] that isn't very 'biker-friendly' except for ultra new rich neighborhoods that 'put in a bike lane' just to 'look rich' or whatever.

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